Had a dream last night that I was selling coke with my ex. The police ended up searching my house, but he helped me clean it out so we got away with it. Then we got back together because that just made sense.
What the hell, brain?
For example, you can:
- be in a shampoo commercial
- start a boy band:
- spot some choice booty:
- break into song:
- see some people in frankly offensive outfits:
- attend a metal show:
- listen to some sick jams:
- discover zombieism:
- sample some tasty snacks:
- watch someone get burned bad:
- find something you really like:
- find something you really, really like:
- find something you REALLY REALLY LIKE:
- and wonder if you left the stove on:
All I have to do…is get through today at the wine store…without don julio to distract me with his bogus antics…and not drink a bunch of wine even when it hits 4 or 5 o clock and I can’t stand the boredom anymore….
Then I get to come back to brooklyn, go out to dinner, come home and bone, and stay in bed all morning & afternoon tomorrow, do 2 hours of work, and have a bbq. That is all.
Today, I get to go surfing and camping on the coast.
Isn’t that nice???
…zero recollection in posting this hahahah
AND I HAVEN’T EVEN BEEN DRINKING.
My lifes not going too great at the moment. I had planned to have petted at least 40% of the dogs on planet earth by now and I have petted maybe 0.5% of the dogs.
I just did the math and it turns out 0.5% of the dogs on the planet is 26 million and I dont even think I’ve petted that many :(
Waking up on November 1st is literally like walking through a door from Halloweentown to Christmastown
What’s this? What’s this? There’s décor everywhere. What’s this? There’s carols in the air. What’s this? I can’t believe my eyes it’s just November come on folks I mean I swear. What’s this?
I FREAKING READ IT IN JACKS VOICE
I FUCKING SANG IT